Monster Inside Me

I really can't believe that it's been one year and two months and yet you're still lingering around like a dormant parasite deep inside my heart. Deep inside you lay sleeping. Cuddled in my blood, asleep. It's like you're not even there at all. But when you strike, my heart aches. Pressure builds up inside of me and there's absolutely no way of numbing the pain. It's impossible to find a pain killer to lessen the hurt. no way to release the pressure. The only way to not hurt is to let it eat me up inside until it's full of it. Until I'm out of energy, until I can no longer hold onto the pain. Then slowly, it goes away. Slowly the suffering and the pressure lessens after I'm out of strength and after I'm tired out. Then into the night, you vanish again within my sleep, within my beautiful dreams of fantastical events. You lay back to sleep, when you're full and done feasting on me. You lay back dormant, like you weren't even there at all. And I, what do I do? I wait, wait for your return to strike this pain again. Wait for your cycle to repeat itself all over again.