Clueless

This song makes me sad. It brings back so many memories. It's almost 11 months now. I thought I was over you, I thought I was done. I thought it wouldn't affect me anymore, but the closer you get to me, the more I yearn for the past. The more I want time to go backwards. The more I hate you for doing the things you did. Even if I want to get back with you, my heart says no. I have set backs in my mind that pulls me back. I can't overlook the things you have done with other girls. I can't accept the feelings you have had for other girls. I can no longer be that patient person you use to know.

Your facebook status says "For once in my life world, let things go my way!!!" I've let so many things go your way. I set you free, let you lose, let you go. I just wanted you to be happy. But I guess happiness doesn't last forever. I love you, but at the same time, I hate you. Sometimes I wish I never knew you; but if I never knew you, who would I be today? You made me who I was today - taught me an important lesson & open my eyes into seeing that life isn't a fairytale nor is it perfect.

I don't know what I want with you anymore. I dislike the new you, and I dislike the old you. I feel selfish, torn, lost, & confused. I don't know what I want anymore...