Daddy ♥

I'm tired of you running back in and out of my life. Every time you get upset you tell me, "I'm going to move far away from here because no one loves me." Well, did you ever take the time to ask if I love you?! & I'm sorry I can never tell you how much I miss, love, and want to be with you. Reason why? Because you've disappeared for so long, like what, 11 years now? A decade?! And so you think you can just run back into my life and tell me you love me? I don't think so. You were never a building block in my life. All you were was just the block that stood on top of every other block, a reminder that tells me this is what I have to over come and not make the same mistake. I hate sucking in these tears, these feelings, emotions, pity, love, and hatred! I hate being part of something I never came to know. Yes, I've grown, matured, and wise. But that does not mean I can forgive every pain and memory without you that I went through. So don't come back telling me how much you love me & how much you want me back in your life because it just doesn't work that way anymore!

But no matter what, you are my father. You are the one I will always love. The one I can never replace. You're the blood that runs through my body, the tiny cells that makes up this heart. You're the man that no man on Earth can replace. & I hate it when you tell me "No one loves me, so I'm going to go far away." Well you know what? WE ALL LOVE YOU! WITH THE DEEPEST PARTS OF OUR HEARTS! LOVE YOU MORE THAN OUR EYES CAN, MORE WIDE THAN THE OCEAN CAN SPREAD, AND DEEPER THAN WHAT YOU CAN IMAGINE! You don't understand how much we want to see you, spend time with you, love and laugh with you. But we can't! There are so many obstacles in our way. Fighting it just seems impossibly impossible.

Every time we see you, time stops. We can never spend enough time with you. Never tell you how much we love you. You don't know how sad it is to watch others celebrate Father's Day without you being there. & so you wonder why, if we love you this much, why can't we simply tell you we love you, we miss you, and spend a little time with you? It's because we've ignored the pain inside our hearts for so long that opening up the wound will just bring in hatred. It's like spilling salt all over our bloody heart. So we decide to ignore it. We decide to bury our feelings, emotions. But deep inside, we love you Daddy. We love you so much! You're the man in our lives that we will never be able to replace. It's just that time makes everything so much harder to grasp. & I hope you understand.

Hang in there daddy, cause we love you no matter how far away you go in this world. You'll always be our man & we love you like crazy.